The Lost Plum…

I’ve been getting alot of messages wanting more details about “Babyface” after my drunken make-out a week back.

Well here is the thing, I am not really here to blog solely on my dating life, and give everyone a break down. (Although I love a good play-by-play…and I know you guys do too!) I also try to never write about someone I am seeing, or see once and might like to see again. I leave the writing for after, the later, the “he’s never calling me back” light bulb above the head.

So, I guess here is the story update on  “Babyface”.

*Insert the ‘he’s not calling me back’ light bulb going off.  <ding>

I got a text message form “Babyface” Sunday morning, afternoon, late afternoon. I in my bed and he in his, exchanged texts about our drunken debaucheries, are meeting, and of course or desire to finally get out of bed and eat something.

He gives me an invite to join him for an early dinner. I text why not, as I’m throwing covers and clothes off me and jumping in the shower.

SIDEBAR: That’s a lie I wasn’t wearing clothes!

I’m running a few late (and had to drop off something at a friends first) I of course text him say so, he says no worries, he lives like 5 blocks from the place anyways.

I get there 3min. late (my bad) he’s there just starting his first beer.

We chitchat, drink, and eat some food, and drink some more. We then head to another bar for a happy hour, and drink more.

About my 4th beer in he turns to me and says,

“Are you nervous?”

“Why would I be nervous? (Laugh, throw back drink) why are you?!”

“You look nervous…You’re so cute”

And he leans in and kisses me.

Now we know how I feel about PDA and don’t get me started on PDA in a place where they serve food.

But (wait for it) I didn’t really mind.  Something about making out in the back booth of an empty bar didn’t bother me so much (it took the P out of the PDA) Maybe, this is why he kept saying I looked nervous.

So you can use your ever-exciting imaginations to imagine what happens next……and then on Tuesday I send him a quick text along the lines of :   Had a great time Sunday, let do it again soon.

Nothing……

Friday night I’m out with friends and a few sangria pitchers later I bring it up, that I never heard from him….not to bitch just bring it up as a fact of life.

And my amazing friend “C” turns to me and says he’s not interested in the best way I have ever heard someone say it.  He grabs his phone and starts pretending to text.

“You see me! You see! See what I’m doing.  Look! Look! It’s not that hard.  ‘ohh there’s a pretty girl on the other end, I need to text back like NOW’….oh she texted again, yeah, text back again…..”

He then closes his phone puts it down and says “He’s a stupid dick!”

“Did you see me, before texting, that’s to the girl I don’t even really like like, and I don’t even want to sleep with her…..you are amazing, anyone who doesn’t text you back asap is crazy!”

I love my friends sometimes…….well all the time!

I got a text today from ‘Video Game Boy’ saying the following:

“I hate how we left things, and basic ended our relationship without talking about it. Call me sometime would love 2 talk + hear how life is treating you.”

So the back-story….

‘Video Game Boy’ or ‘VGB’ was in the picture for maybe like 10 days over 3 weeks (sometime back in the fall) Now let us sit back and deconstruct this “relationship” he speaks of.

We had one date, which was a blind date. He was funny, his job was interesting. He was cute in that everyone has attractive qualities about him or her, and that is about it. Oh, and he could hold his alcohol well.

So, on a drunken first date (not like I’ve done that before) I went home with him. Needless to say, our “relationship” ended up being him texting me now and again drunk and me usually being out and drunk, then showing up at his place (at like 2am) to have great drunken sex. To top it all off, I wouldn’t even get a good sleep cause he’d wake me up after a few hours of sleep because he was playing some zombie killing video game on high volume (in his tiny ass studio)

So, here is my question. Does “VGB” actually think this ploy to get me to contact him will work? I mean we all know the translation of his text is:

“Hey, I haven’t been laid since I last saw you. We should hang out, I’ll totally take you out and buy you drinks all night if we can fuck after.”

So, why doesn’t he just text that, not that that would get a better response, in fact it probably would still get no response, but I can respect me some honesty….maybe it’s cause I’m just a terrible liar!

Oh and I did text him back (I’m not a total bitch).

“Hey great to hear from you, I’m alittle busy the next few weeks but I hope all is well with you.”

(reason #___why I’m single: I love video games but resent boys who like to play them after sex)

SIDEBAR: I agree to go on blind dates and then question my friendships afterwards. My friends always set me up with guys who are ’so not my type’ it really makes me wonder!

FACT: His tiny ass studio was about 3 blocks from the office so it was very convenient.

Was having dinner with Simone and my new favorite man theBOy the other night and the topic of Older men vs. Younger men came up.

Is sex better with a younger guy or an older guy?

I was by far the ‘younger’ of the group (sorry guys) but I still have (well am able to have) an opinion on the subject. There is this myth out there that older men “physically” aren’t as good, or as able to be good in bed.  Now, I’m not out there cruising the senior’s centers or anything, but I will tell you my thought when it comes to the horizontal age difference.

Biggest age differences I’ve had sexually was 16 years, and have had a few more that are over 10. Here’s my thought on the subject.

An older guy is most likely going to rock your world (and I mean earthquake-volcano-eruption-terror-alert-red rocking) but it is going to happen once and then there needs to be a break (a big break) AKA. Don’t go expecting any more rocking for at least 12 hours!

A younger guy, he’s going to be noticed on the Richter scale alittle bit sure, and you are going to get a few after shocks in there as well! Or he is going to be like Al Roker promising rain and then have you lugging around an umbrella for sunny days on end wishing it would just rain already! AKA. He’ll rock your socks a few time more the the older guy, but you’re going to want that cause you’re still waiting for the socks to fly off!

It’s like a war out there.You can use that nuclear weapon once, or you can pull out the gun and hope your aim is good.  Just make sure you choose your weapon wisely!  ;)

Heading out of the city this week and back to my ‘home and native land’.  So, I have been trying really hard to get some work done, and…. get some work done. It hasn’t been much of a success. I’ve been in a funk. A work funk and even sorta a life funk.

My friend “meangirl” suggests it cause I’m not having enough sex, or as she put it enough ‘good sex‘.

Now, sex is usually always good. I take that back it can be bad, very very bad. But, in general sex is good, it might not blow your mind every time (and as of late it hasn’t blown much) but it is still good.

See “meangirl” has this theory that subconsciously when we aren’t being satisfied the way we want it affects our bodies and minds more then we realize.

I posed the question about what does that mean when we aren’t getting any sex. She simple said you hit a certain point where you have come to accept (and deal) with not having physical sex, and although we also might hate that it’s less detrimental to our systems then when sex unsatisfied us.

Interesting!? We talked about those sexual partners that no one will ever be able to live up to, but you keep praying for one that does. How sex with that person was never a stress, never complicated, it just was GREAT SEX. (Obliviously, great sex doesn’t make a good relationship, but you all should be grownup enough to know that)

I’ve been thinking about this all day, and I think she has a point. Maybe in order to de-stress I just need really good sex without complications.

(I just need my ‘friend’ to give up working in a big certain coloured house and move back to the city!)

SIDEBAR: my friend “meangirl” isn’t mean; she just played one in a movie once.

I’ve been working on a blog about Things we women say/talk about that really actually scare guys away (besides saying you want lots and lots of babies!  BABIES! )

I notice that my friend Tom over at YourTango wrote a post about Why Your Number Doesn’t Matter.  One of his points falls under the topic of things we think he wont care about but he totally does!

Tom says in his post that basically guys won’t care about famous people you have had sex with.   He claims they won’t be jealous, and may even want to hang out with him.

First off, if you are dating a guy who only wants to meet your ‘famous’ friends, you should dump him.  ASAP. I’m serious!  Been there done that! Most guys, (not all) but most, want to meet your famous female friends to hit on and have hopes of hooking up with them, and the whole pretty girls lead to pretty girl’s theory.  Guy also want to meet your famous male friends, because of groupies! Just watch Encourage once; Guy’s gets girls by association.  They know this, and we all know this.  So if your man keeps bringing up meeting your ‘famous’ friend question his intentions.

Also, I hate to disagree with Tom but guys DO care what famous people you have slept with. And here are the examples:

1: “ I don’t know who that is….”

That guy you slept with once or twice or for a few months who is on/was on “that TV show” he claims to have never seen. Or played a supporting role in that huge summer blockbuster movie. Most of the time they will say they “don’t know”, have never seen that because they don’t want to hear details.  Or on those occasion they really don’t know you better believe he is googling and imdb-ing that person first chance he gets: translation jealous!

2:  “ He’s in the Band……”

You better believe guys care about band guys. Band guys translate to groupies, and tours and on that note tour busses.  Which translates into wondering if you are a groupie slut or have been in a past life.  I dated a guy in a pretty successful band and let me tell you the sigma of “band groupie” (which I never was) is not pretty, we all know this.  And again, this is one he will claim to not knowing and will Google.  Watch videos, listen to songs, and see pictures of hundreds of girls throwing themselves at these guys.  I had a guy I started dating once ask if I snuck onto a tour bus, in reference to my ex.  I was shocked.  Do I look like a girl who would sneak on a tour bus, or follow a band cross-country? But more so, he’s saying and thinking “this girl will have sex with whom ever if they are ‘famous’” And this in tern leads to maybe not jealousy all the time, but more it changes how a guy sees you. And thinks about your past.

3:  “ There have been a few…”

When you happen to have had relations with multiple “famous” people that makes guys minds spin, and really not in a good way.  There is the band guy, the movie star, the TV guy, the TV and movie guy…ect.   They start to wonder what you did to snag a guy like that.  I had a guy I slept with recently when this topic came up and I mentioned a certain actor and he said, “I thought he had a girlfriend” It wasn’t said as a question. It was said very matter of factually.  I sorta explained but didn’t cause all I could think of was he was questioning my morals with a statement like that. How does he not after saying that!  They also start to think they aren’t good enough if you happen to always date ‘famous’ people.  They feel like they can’t live up to that.  I’ve had a few guys tell me after we broke up/stopped seeing each other in that way that they were always alittle jealous of the fact I had had sex with “so and so”, and felt they could never be as good as that person (not in a sex way but in a life way!)

Guys care about numbers, yes!

I’m not one to talk numbers; all you need to know is if I’m clean, period.  But lets say you throw out a number of ‘famous’ people you have had sex with. I find this question pops up more then the whole number question.

And it does for a reason.  Guys know that you shouldn’t really ask a girl how many people she has slept with unless maybe you are totally in a serious ‘thing’, but the guy you go out with once a week and have sex finds it is perfectly acceptable to bring up the famous people thing. I mean it pops up very casually, and can fit into conversation easily and usually girls don’t really question the question.  If they can find out how many famous people you have slept with that can lead to guessing a total number.

I personally always say “what do you consider famous?” But that’s cause I fall into #3 above (there have been a few).  See here is the thing; I tell a guy I’ve been involved with 4 (maybe 5, but again what do you consider famous?) So I tell a guy 5 guys, that makes my number in his mind already 10.  He’ll assume I didn’t lose my virginity to a famous person, and there is him, and of course university/and the fact that I date a lot. Hell that might even make him think 20.

Basically, in translation a guy might seem ok with it, might want to hang with your famous ex-bed partner, but you better believe he has thought about it and will continue to think about it.

You’ll get the slide “did you see so-and-so on perezhilton today” or “so-and-so’s new movie is coming out”. They aren’t saying this as a friendly I bet you’d be interested or I care about you kind of way.  They say it to judge your reaction.  Because guys are always jealous, but more so guys are jealous about the guy you are seeing blown up on the movie screen while you are out on a date with him, or who’s song is being played while you guys are at the bar, rather then the random banker you happen to have dated.

Therefore, the famous people you slept with count, and sometimes count twice!

SIDEBAR:  I truly believe you can “lose” a guy by admitting to having sex with and even better having dated a famous person. VERY few guys will just find this fact cool. They get intimidated, jealous and scared and next thing you know they are gone.  It however, doesn’t work as well as screaming about your need for BABIES! Lots and lots of Babies!