I’ve talked about commercials before. I’m bothered by a commercial that deal with “female issues”, I just am. I’ve talked before on how I don’t like the women in most of them, and then I talked about how some point out how stupid the female population is. But this one takes the cake on pointing out how stupid/dumb/ridiculous the female population can be.

Bayer has come out with a new ad champagne that encourages women to learn more about their birth control. This comes off the back of them being sued millions of dollars for apparently not adequately informing women about the health risks.

Ok first off, if you take any medications you should know what it is, how it works, how it affects your body and interacts with other drugs you take. Your health should always be number one. You need to understand how stuff works. That’s “Living 101.”

Anyways, so although I agree that it’s good of Bayer to let you know that you should take control of your health I have an issue with their commercials. A huge issue.

If you haven’t seen the commercial in question let me break it down for you. There are these women who are blind folded feeling a rhinoceros.  They touch the rhino all over and are trying to figure out what they are touching.

These women give the absolute dumbest answers that one could ever say while feeling up a living breathing moving rhino!  Answers given include: a wall, a rope, a pipe, and my all time favorite is the stupid chick who get’s ear slapped in the hand by a rhino and guesses… A BRUSH!

WTF?!  Where are all these stupid women coming from!  At least I’m glad someone is trying to make sure they all know how to use birth control correctly, cause God forbid these dumb ass chicks get pregnant and start procreating…..that is if they can read the pregnancy test.

Oh here’s the link to the commercial so you can watch for yourself.

***********

Oh and if you like, dislike, agree, disagree, or want to cock punch me over this opinion (or me in general) you should check LostPlum (that’s me) out tonight from 10-11pm EST. on Shivio.com because I’m going to be a guest on Abiola on LSD: Love, Sex, Dating. The show is hosted by the ever amazing, always funny, constantly sexy Abiola Abrams!  It’s going to be hot hot hot.  You can watch, listen, chat, and even beam in….with me!

I am now one of relationship video advise contributor to LovemORLeavem.com

Bi weekly our exciting group of Vloggers answer your questions when it comes to dating/relationship/sex/ and all the good stuff in between. “One Topic – Many Perspectives”

CHECK OUT MY VIDEO: When should you start a new relationship after a break up?

So head over to LovemOrLeavem.com and check out everyones video response to this week’s question and many others!

It’s March. When did that happen? And to top that all off it is March 2010! Seems like only a year ago I was professing my love for Peeps on Twitter.

Note to self: Profess love for Peeps on Twitter.

The last few months have been busy. Filled with stress, heart breaks, and new exciting ventures. New people, new adventures, and being officially moved into my new apartment.

Not to self: Rethink all white bedroom, given my food/drink accident ratio.

Exciting changes and announcements are on the way here at LostPlum.com

It was not one of my New Years resolutions but I’m adding to that resolutions list to be better at not only posting daily but also responding to your comments and fun emails. I do try, and yeah, sometimes I just sleep in and watch Netflix’s all day.

But if you come here to my little site and find I haven’t posted in a few days you should do the following:

A: Send me mean emails telling me that the only excuses for not posting is my fat ass was busy getting less fat at the gym.

B: Get a life. It’s my blog, and I’ll post if I want.

C: I guess I twitter everyday so you could always just go there if you’re missing out on my amazing wit and charm.

Here’s too all the many  posts to come…whether they be good or not.

FACT: This is a throwaway lame ass post….I know. See bullet B: !

I’m going to be part of an exciting event tomorrow Tuesday Feb 16^th.  Abiola’s Kiss and Tell Live a sexy storytelling and performance series in New York City. Tomorrow night we will honor Deborah Gregory author and creator of The Cheetah Girls. It’s going to be hot hot hot!

The lineup for the evening (in no specific order) Mama Cheetah Deborah Gregory, Twanna Hines the Funky Brown Chick, filmmaker Therese Shechter of Trixie Films, Modern Courtesan Yolanda Shoshana, comic David Lester, Boy Butter creator Eyal Feldman, Lesbian Activist and Writer Renair Amin, Danielle Henderson of Knotty Yarn, singing duo Sabrina and Giorgio, Lost Plum (that’s me!) and Mia “On Top” Martina, erotic podcaster.

Kiss & Tell Live Erotica and Comedy! Fat Tuesday 2/16, free, 7-10pm at Madame X in NYC: http://bit.ly/csczOG

I’m going to read something that has yet to be posted, and may never be posted…so would you miss out!?

See you all there!

And feel bad this morning.  You see I let you all slip.  I mentioned last week that I had the next few weeks all preposted and wrote so that I could focus on work, and my ever-daunting apartment move.

FACT: I hate packing. I hate unpacking. I hate moving.

You see I did prewrite posts for everyday. I was very proud of this fact, and excited that I wouldn’t have to think about it.  Well this morning as I sit in the car waiting. (stupid offside/alternate side parking!)

I was thinking to myself I hadn’t received many comments, or an email in regards to the last few days posts.

This seemed odd. I might not get tons of comments, but I sure do always get emails.

SIDEBAR: I do read and enjoy all your emails. I’ve been really slow at getting back to all of them lately, but your reply is coming just you wait!

So, I go over to the blog, and low and behold I have nothing posted since Sunday. What?! But I wrote posts for the next two weeks, why aren’t they posting?  So I look into it, and there are no scheduled posts to go out that have been missed. In fact there is nothing.

SIDEBAR: There are SUNDAY PULLS, because those I have a backlog of.

Where are all my posts!!??  I was about 2 minutes from crying, and then I realized something.  Yup! I wrote them all in a word document, but never moved them to the blog.  I must have been so proud of myself for doing two weeks worth of blogs in one night that I rewarded myself with sleep and then forgot that I hadn’t complete what I set out to do.

And now I’m thinking how I do this in relationships.  I tend to think I’ve said what I am thinking.  I sometimes believe that guys should be able to read my mind, and therefore I don’t need to tell them how I feel. And this is how I get hurt. It’s like the last week when I talked about those little heartbreaks. The small ones that you try not to notice. Mostly these come about because I never say anything. I don’t stand up and say “HEY MR. YOU! I’VE FALLEN FOR YOU, AND I DON’T WANT TO GET UP” Instead, I assume they know this, I make jokes, brush off the important ‘feelings’ thing and end up not saying anything.

Just like the last few days…I’ve said nothing.  To the three of you that missed me, I’m sorry.

Read some press here, or even here.

Read about the amazing 24 hour play company, or even better the great organization that we are raising money for tonight; Urban Arts Partnership.

Now with out going into super detail about the process I’ll tell you a quick thing. Each actor comes into the process with a prop, a costume, and then tells everyone about a few talents they have, and something they have always wanted to do on stage.

So in the spirit of me not really sleeping tonight (having to be back at the theatre in 3 hours) here is a short list of my “talents”:

- I am amazing at the pogo-ball! My all time record was 2 hours and 43 minutes (I was 9 but still)

- I can tie a knot in a cherry steam with my tongue quickly. In fact I’ll do you one better I can tie a knot at both ends, and depending on the steam one in the middle.

- I can push my nose pretty much right against my face. I mean flat ass against my face. Pushed out, stretched out FLAT. It creeps people the fuck out.

- I remember step numbers in my head for some unknown reason. If I’ve walked up and down them I can pretty much tell you exactly how many steps there are (sometimes give or take 2)

- I am an expect wall painter.

- I know surprisingly too much about animal health. This includes picking out ailments in how dogs walk down the sidewalk. If your pet is sick I probably have a good idea what is wrong with it.

- I’m actually really good at playing the drums, like I should be in a band good. Ok maybe a girl band but still.

- I am a very good kisser (I have references)

One of my fellow bloggers and twitter friends has an installment on her site, which are letters to her future husband.

That’s not what I’m going to do here (that would be stealing….sorta). As much as I love the idea of writing stuff down and putting it out there in the world, the letter I want to write will indeed be read by it’s intended recipient.

SIDEBAR: My one and only letter to a future husband would read something like this:  Wow, you aren’t a douche bag, which is kind of nice. Ring size 6.

This letter is meant for YOU. Yup, you !

        Dear my lovely, messed up, crazy bunch of readers,

I was thinking about you today, as I was gasping for breath at the gym. You see my friend ‘Babs’ is always yelling at me when we go out about how there are certain stories I have not shared with you.(‘Babs’ doesn’t really yell, but the conversations comes up once we are sauced, thus, she speaks about 3 octaves above her normal voice.)

Since I don’t know your ring size as a collective, I thought I would give you this promise ‘letter’. Feel free to print it out and wrap it around your finger, and think pleasant thoughts about me!

I, Lost Plum, promise to provide you with more blog posts that fall under the ‘a long-long time ago!’ category, and bring some stories out the closet.          ~L.P

GOAL: I’ll try to keep the humour on the down low because I keep getting comments, emails, and twitter messages about people reading and spitting up all over their screens. I feel bad about the possibility of wrecking others computers. 

FACT: Mama plum always says “yeah but EVERYONE has a blog, that’s nothing special!” So using the term ‘a fellow blogger’ is something she wouldn’t approve of, because I might as well say a fellow human being.

FACT: I did get little flutters in my stomach thinking that one of you out there likes me enough to do such a thing.

So, it’s one of those things where you need to sign up for the site to vote. I know I know! But it’s completely free to sign up, and you can choose the option to not get any terrible junk emails from them (you only get a welcome one), which is a huge plus.

Diving Caroline has some great stuff and interesting articles on all sorts of different things. Check it out, it might be your thing…and it might not be.

But more importantly the prize is $250 Visa Gift Card…..and I could buy a lot of fruit to drop for $250!  If I won of course I’d use that money to get myself into some trouble that I would write about, what else would I do with it!?

So if you feel like wasting 2 seconds to vote for me, or more like 2.2 seconds, or 3 seconds depending on how quick you type, a vote would make me feel loved. It’s been along week already so YES I’m being one of THESE girls!

SIDEBAR: This is a throw away post cause I’ve been working hard and stressing over my important deadline on friday, and trying to stay focused on just that.

(reason #___why I’m single: I do things like ask for you to vote for me)

FACT: Most bullshit reason ever to be fired….RIGHT HERE!

An unnamed Off-Broadway THEATER

TOTAL FOUND =$ 13.74 

(that dollar coin really was exciting to find, to bad I can’t spend it anywhere)

HOURS WORKED =

Now this is harder to figure out. I know of 32 days total I was not at the theater, but let’s round up and say 50 days I didn’t go in. I would say I work an average of 10 hours a day, but lets round that down to 8 (evens out those days I didn’t come in, and those days I didn’t sleep and spent the night, or two) Let’s say 360 days in the year minus the 50 days = 310 days/8hours each 2480 hours (and thats not including the fact I’m attached to my phone/email)

= 2480 hours

SO

$13.74 over 2480 hours

= $.0055 cents an hour! 

Conclusion: I love theater! where else can you make that much money from just bending down to pick it up, and get fired on a sunday.