Texting foul….
A few nights back I was having a DM conversation with @SimoneGrant on twitter, and telling her about the mysterious text messages I was receiving from a number I did not recognize.
FACT: If there is an award for best/most 140character DM conversations @simonegrant and I (@lostplum) would win! Seriously!
Now I knew two things about the texter on the other end. It was clearly a man, and clearly he wanted to see what I was up to.
SIDEBAR: I was up to stuffing my face with pudding and on the couch cathing up on my dvr still in my gym clothes from earlier.
Now like any of my friends (or even you my readers) might do, she jumped to the conclusion that it must be some random guy I’ve given my number to at some point. She even offered up a few suggestions (she has clearly been out drinking with me) I tend to pretty much give my number to any seaming normal person. I do this because I find it fun to play the “I bet he texts me (—)” game, which I have become, VERY VERY good at! I can pretty much give a guy my number after talking for about 30-minutes and tell you exactly what he will text me and when (or at least really close) If I ever entre another beauty (scholarship fund) competition again in my life that will be my talent.
But this isn’t a post about my talents (that would be far to long) this is a blog about the text I hate the most. So I finally figure out who the boy is. And we are chatting.
Friend who has a crush on me: “How’s your night going?”
Plum: “ Not bad. How about yours?”
Friend with crush: “Ok, but why don’t you come and make it better.”
And there it was THAT message. That “come over and make ME better”, “want to make IT better” text. I f-ing hate that text!
Let me tell you something guys you have a much better chance of A: getting me to hang out with you and B: getting to feel “better” if you just ask in a nice friendly matter if I want to have a drink, or grab a late dinner. Seriously, dude! It’s already past 10pm, I already know what you are hitting at you don’t have to be slimy about it.
It’s not “cute” and it’s not getting me off my couch it’s making me so much “BETTER” then you are!
Hmmm so is it better, worse, or indifferent if one was to hypothetically text you to come over and make you feel better? You wouldn’t even have to put down the pudding or leave the couch for that matter ;)
hm. i have to rethink how i communicate with my friend with benefits.
Most guys who booty-text after 10 pm have no idea that, whereas they THINK they’re all sexy and smooth, in actual fact, they come across like Disco Stu
I once was told a similar “slimy booty-call text” story by a female friend, to which I replied “Does that ever work out for these guys?” to which she sheepishly responded by indicating that it had…on her…the last time he did it..
.
And that friends, is why Disco Stu will never die.