The Lost Plum…

So, online dating…..yeah I do it, we all do it (just say it out loud and get over it……the term “dating” can mean different things for different people)

So I get the most messages on OKCUPID. I get a lot of short, very basic, pretty much generic emails, or the ever not exciting “wink”

(Simone wrote a great post about “the wink” Read it!)

So I got this email today from some random guy, who said something interesting: “I probably wont get an email back from you cause youre listed as very selective in replying, but thought it was worth a shot. I think youre your profile is great and would love to know more.”

Selective? Am I that selective? Ok wait….I shouldn’t have put a question mark behind that; OF COURSE I’m selective!

I Will Not Respond To You If:

1- You are over the age of 38
2- You are not over the age of 26
3- Your user name contains the word: hot, sexy, or guy.
4- You are an actor (and pretend that is how you make your living)
5- I recognize you as being my friend’s doorman
6 – You have N/A listed in more then 3 of your basic stats (this excludes income…you do not have to list that in my book)
7- You have more then 1 picture with you and a group of ‘attractive’ girls.
8- You’re from Europe
9- You say you are looking for a girl who “takes care of themselves” Serious, dudes, do you think someone reads that looks down at the stains on their shirt and say “oh that’s not me, too bad.” JUST SAY you don’t like FAT girls. See #10
10- Your profile translates to DOUCHE-BAG!
11- I know just by looking at you that you aren’t funny
12- I know just by looking at you that I’m smarter then you
13- You have kids. (but thanks for being honest)
14- You have a picture of you reading a book. Come on, honestly what’s the last book you really did read?
15- You can’t mention anything we have in common from my profile, but insist we have stuff in “common”
16- You are Egyptian.
17- You say you are looking for someone who can carry on a conversation….again, do you think someone reads that and says, “nope, not me!”

SIDEBAR: That’s not that selective, is it?

(reason #___why I’m single: All the above?)