The Lost Plum…

After prodding from friends I decided to actually go out with one of the men I meet while dropping fruit.  I had a total of 42 business cards (not bad for only spending $28.57 total on bruised fruit)

I had the “no thank you” pile, and the “hmm not too bad” pile, and the eleven I thrown out already. I took all 13 ‘not to bad’ business cards threw them in a hat (well actually I was not sitting near a hat and I’m lazy so I threw them in my pillowcase still on pillow I might add) and pulled one out.

Doctor ~check

Buys potatoes ~check

Oh so yummy looking ~check

Somewhere back in Canada my mother was smiling and on one knee thanking god!

I sent the fruit doctor, oh I’m sorry, the fruit-dentist an email. He replied within 10minutes…not bad, not bad! We decide to meet for coffee mid day between meetings (for both of us) I walk in and wow, yeah, fruit-dentist man is even more attractive then I remember him to be.

SIDEBAR: personal history has taught me that very attractive men equals douche-bag….but I try to throw that thought out the window.

Everything is going well, we chat about my job (aka jobs!) his new job (he just graduated from dental school) potatoes (I couldn’t not ask what he made with them) He’s talking about how much he loves his new job and how being cosmetic dentists really makes the world a better place.

AND THEN….. (you knew there was a THEN coming!)

He starts in on everything that is wrong with my teeth! From the colour, to the point of my custpid’s (?—canine teeth), the one filling he can see, my gummy smile, and so on….

I was like talking looking down, trying not to smile, and somewhat covering my mouth.  (Characteristics, which are so not me!) I decided to leave the date early.

Fruit-Dentist: I thought your meeting was at 4?

Me: I know, I’m sorry it got rescheduled just before I got here.

Fruit-Dentist: Ok, well, you owe me a rain-check.

Where? In your dentist chair to fix my terrible teeth!? Is this guy serious! 

First off, I would like to think I have very nice straight teeth for never having them whitened or having had braces or the like.

In fact, the thing that bothers me the most about this is I am a teeth person. (Apparently, not as much of a teeth person as he is)

If you have bad teeth you don’t have a chance with me. If you are my friend and you have bad teeth you are an amazing amazing person because I have overlooked this and overlooking bad teeth is hard for me.

And then this douche-bag has to go and tell me I could use some teeth “improvements”

Well at least he paid for my coffee!

 

FACT:  Fruit-Dentist made himself mashed potatoes.

(reason #___why I’m single: I don’t have perfect teeth)