'Missed' Messages….
(I’m writing this from the train, not even home yet)
I had a coffee date today with my “missed connections” guy. He had posted a craigslist-missed-connection about me at the Thrillist.com party last week. I found it via friends (which is how I have become aware of all 12 of my “missed mystery men”)
However, this is the first guy I have ever meet or contacted. I should have stuck to just feeling good about the complement.
We planned to meet for coffee, he really wanted to do dinner or late night drinks all last week, but I told him my schedule was full, and this was the only time I could fit him in. Half true: more true that I was never going to meet some random “missed connections” guy at night!
So I get a text about 5minutes before our scheduled meet time “just getng out of showr b 10 order me a mocca anything.”
I sit down wait and he texts “3 blcks. I’ll drink whatev you get.”
So, he’s late and texts like a 14 year old, not the best start, but I shrug it off. I order him a mocha something and I get a tea.
He arrives, wow! This boy is cute! Really? Like where did he come from?!
We start talking and then about 5-10 minutes into the conversation:
Missed-Man: you should finish up so we can get back to my place, I have a date at 7.
Me: Excuse me?
Missed-Man: You know. I have a thing later, you said you had a thing. We should just finish up and get back to my place.
Me: Your place for what?
Missed-Man: (laughs) You’re such a tease. (laughs)
Me: Pardon?
Missed-Man: Come on. (throws back his drink) You ready to go? Lets get this done.
Me: Get this done? I’m sorry I didn’t realize you posted in the casual encounters section.
Missed-Man: It’s the Internet what did you expect?
Me: I don’t know…
(He laughs)
Me: Wow (uncomfortable laugh)
Missed–Man: Whatever, fine, miss out on this! Bitch
He walked away and I sat there dumbfounded. I’m sorry, dude, but based on your emails about how nice I looked, my beautiful smile across the room, and how you would have loved to gotten a chance to talk to me and the fact you agreed to meet me for coffee, after you went out on the internet to try and find me I assumed you, well assume…..I guess I should just never assume anything especially when it comes to men!
FACT: Oh and I had to pay for his coffee! So I guess he at least got that out of me!
Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone with SprintSpeed
OMG. I don’t even know what to say. I’m so sorry I encouraged you to contact him, saying, “what have you got to lose”.
Talk about a douchebag.
Yes, but look at the great story I got out of it! :)
I’m not sure what’s more disturbing: the fact that he thinks every website is AdultFriendFinder, the fact that he talks about “getting this done” so he can get on with his day or that he texts likes a chimpanzee on drugs.
Almost makes me ashamed to be male.
a chimpanzee is right :) (and no need to be ashamed, there are way more guys out there that aren’t like thi, then ones that are) welcome to the blog spike:)
Was this the 3 hour bus ride to Bushwick guy? Geez.
Well, first things first. I love that you have ‘missed connection’ guys. I mean, that’s kind of sexy really. And okay, so you got the un-sexy douche bag ‘missed connection’ guy this time round.
But really, what a great story.
KB first welcome to my blog!
No, 3 hr. subway guy was yesterday (that went alittle better…see that post)
I don’t know if I’ll ever make a go at another missed connection time around, but then again, you never know what story you may get from it
I think it really is something that can go either way. Or maybe the thing to do is to make it super clear about what you’re prepared to do before you meet them.
That guy should learn some manners though.
Or better yet, just go pay a hooker.
I had an online conversation with a guy like that. And eventually I was just like, hey dude, why don’t you just call 1-800-Hooker because, no I’m not coming round to your apartment in 30 minutes to come do you. The best part? He was really offended by that.
Anyway, out of those 12 ‘missed connections’, one of them might be worth. You never know….
this was the 12th so the others have all been in the past….I think I can deal with that though.
I’ve had convos with guys like that before too, I’ll have to remember to use 1-800-hooker next time! ; )
WOW……geez men are idiots, well most straight men that is..
well, I mostly only find myself on dates with the straight ones, and yes most seem to be idiots:) Thanks for the comment and welcome Holly!
How big did his package look? Cause I might need you to forward me his number so I can get my TEXT on!
sorry about the horrible experience,
but as least he showed up–mine cancelled.
ugh.
MEN!
aww honey, I’m sorry yours cancelled! I know that feeling, so yeah at least mine showed up. And nope his package didn’t pop out or anything. And he was a terrible dresser (although super cute!)
Thanks for the comment and welcome to my little blog
you are alot of things, but bitch is not one of them.
What a dick.
How could he possibly think that can kind of behavior would get him laid? Then again, maybe if he texted like a fourteen year-old, he thought he might be meeting on with daddy/dickhead issues to figure out with him.
Or, the more likely theory?
Just a douchebag. Probably went home all confused and thinking women suck.
By the way, I found you on Twitter today as I was investigating my new batch of followers.
Thank for following me, I will give you a follow back.
Will be looking for new posts as well.
Have a great day!
-Jessie
Thanks Jessie, and welcome to my blog!
I have no idea what he was thinking at the time, or after….but then again I don’t speak douchebag ;)
He was rude, but he did have a point: you don’t find quality on the Intertron.
And you weren’t entirely surprised were you? I mean… put it this way, if every man knew for certain before a date that he had exactly 0% chance of sex, how many would turn up?
I’m never surprised by anything ;)
Oh no! I really can’t believe that someone would go through all that trouble to find you, and then say some BS thing that like! What an ass!
I know right!!
ARE YOU KIDDING ME, what an asshole! But this is also really really funny. The worst date story of the year!
WE AREN’T ALL LIKE THIS I PROMISE :)
Jeff…..I know you aren’t!
are you kidding me?????????
this is by far the worst first date i have ever heard of. what a jerk!
don’t even know what to say so I’ll jump on the “dick” train that has already been echoed…..straight up dick!
wtf
Late to the party, but I’ll take offence to the assumption that guys who know there’s a 0% chance of sex on a first date would simply not show up. Speaking as someone who only once managed to increase that percentage, I’ll still say you’d have to be quite stupid to restrict yourself to only leaving the house for “sure things” since you’d be home “all by yoursef” Greenday-style quite a bit.
JennyLaw– Me kid? Never!
.
carla — you said it I didn’t ;)
.
carrie_ann — chew-chew!
.
Peter — yup!
.
sayer — i’m confused at how you take offence to this. Who made that assumption. He def didn’t!
Holy CRAP.
I didn’t know stuff like that really happened.
What a douchebag.
-R.
p.s. I like the Legal disclaimer.
random esquire — thanks for your first comment. Douchebag indeed….and thanks ;)
You had to buy the coffee, but you missed out on a venerial disease. I’d say you were up one on the evening in that case!